Have you ever found yourself constantly apologizing for yourself, or saying, “I’m sorry…I’m sorry…for everything”, OR expecting everyone else to apologize for their behaviors because you feel hurt? If this is YOU, then this is the perfect episode for you.
SHOW NOTES…
First, let’s go back to yesterday’s SACRED S.O.L. STEP, did you write a Love Letter to yourself? If not, please do yourself a favor, and do so. If you you haven’t yet listened to EPISODE 031: Live Unconditionally Loved, I encourage you to listen, and take immediate action.
Once you’ve written your letter, the next step is to stand in front of the mirror, and read it out loud to yourself.
When I wrote my first book, Dr. Shannon Knows…The 12 Steps of WELLTHY People: How to Make Healthy Your Habit, I wrote about this, because it’s been a huge step in my own healing. Since then I’ve used it with all my clients, and it’s been very effective.
My best friend read my book, and did this exercise. It was such a breakthrough for her. I believe it will be for you too. Up to that point, she had no idea that she hadn’t been loving herself well.
It can be emotional, but feel into it with LOVE.
You’re worth it.
There’s no condition that’s bigger than, or too much for, you to overcome, break into, and breakthrough, to show yourself how much you love yourself, and how lovable and loving you really are.
The word “lovable” means able to love. If you feel unlovable, the greatest way to position yourself is to take the ability that you have to love, and give it to YOU. Once you’re able to love, you CANNOT be unlovable.
I’d love to hear what you experience from doing the Love Letter exercise.
Today we’re continuing with the “UN-Series.”
What would it look like for you to LIVE UNAPOLOGETIC?
If you find yourself apologizing for you, saying you’re sorry, and taking on everyone else’s responses as your responsibility, then today’s the day to get some new insight.
Women constantly say, “I’m sorry.”
Please stop excusing or making excuses for yourself.
The next time you say it, ask yourself what you’re really saying. Are you dismissing your feelings, or your need to express them or yourself?
Ask yourself what you’re really SORRY for. As well as why you’re saying it.
There’s so much power in the words we speak. Out of the abundance of your heart, your mouth speaks. What’s your heart saying?
Is there a belief in your heart that says you need to apologize for yourself? Or that you must dismiss what you think, feel, or do?
The difference between an apology and an, “I am sorry” is also key.
“I am” is the most powerful statement.
Be selective when choosing the words that follow an “I am” statement. Stop claiming what you don’t desire, or something that’s simply not true.
There’s a difference between saying, “I apologize” and “I’m sorry.” Apologizing for a mistake, and being sorry for BEING the mistake, by saying, “I’m sorry” is the difference.
You can make mistakes, but it doesn’t mean YOU ARE a mistake. Like I spoke about in the episode, Live Unashamed (EPISODE 29).
Shame is the difference between living apologetically and living unapologetically.
You can say, “I apologize” when necessary, and still LIVE UNAPOLOGETIC.
This is an UNAPLOGETIC LIFE:
No longer saying, “I’m sorry” for who you are.
No longer saying, “I’m sorry” for having feelings.
Apologizing when necessary, but not because you feel responsible for others.
Own your OWN actions and intentions.
It comes down to INTENTION.
What’s your intention?
Own your mistakes, but don’t be sorry for who you are in making them.
What’s this idea of “Sorry. Not sorry?” There’s no more need to say sorry for not being sorry.
You don’t have to apologize for everything you do in your life.
If you feel the huge need to give an apology, first give it to yourself. That’s right, apologize to yourself for not being your biggest advocate. For not actually standing up and expressing your actions, feelings, or emotions. Give yourself permission to feel how you feel. Apologize to yourself and FORGIVE YOURSELF.
In summary:
A. Stop saying you’re sorry all the time.
B. Own it. Who you are. Your voice, emotions, feelings, and life. Stop apologizing for yourself.
C. Forgive yourself.
Forgive yourself for what you feel responsible for in everyone else’s lives and your life…and own your responsibility.
Let it, and yourself go. Then you’ll be able to forgive others.
You apologize or point fingers, when really the most important step is that you receive your own forgiveness. Then you can forgive others, and stop waiting for everyone else to apologize to you.
Apologize and ask for forgiveness when necessary, but it starts with you.
Stop saying you’re sorry. Live the truth. Stand in it. Show up in it. Live in it. Speak it.
Own your voice, and stop apologizing for it.
This IS an UNAPOLOGETIC LIFE.
Please grab your SACRED S.O.L. D.A.T.E. JOURNAL (Daily Action To Engage with yourself.)
TODAY’S SACRED S.O.L. STEP:
1. Write down, “I am NOT sorry!”
2. Make a commitment today to stop saying “I’m sorry” all the time.
Thanks for being here. Please stop by WomenSippingOnLife.com, and let me know how you’re doing. I’ll look forward to seeing you again tomorrow.
xo Dr. Shannon. Inspiring minds that want to grow and hearts that want to know, so you can love you, your life, and your life’s work well. ONE SIP AT A TIME.
A special thanks to the following souls for helping me launch our WOMEN SIPPING ON LIFE podcast…
Intro/Outro done by Uni V. SOL
Outro music by Jay Man: Mind Over Matter (www.ourmusicbox.com)
Podcast cover design and web site done by: Pablo Aguilar (www.webdesigncreator.com)
Podcast cover photo by Kate Montague of KM Captured (www.kmcaptured.com)