This week I did a Facebook Live and asked the question, “Are you a people pleaser?” In today’s episode I show you how you can set yourself free from the epidemic of people pleasing.
Everyone suffers from this at some level. It’s an age-old problem. I believe it’s part of being human, but some of us take it way too far.
Do you care more about others’ opinions of you than you care about your OWN opinion of YOU?
The problem with this is, you lose yourself in the process.
Am I talking to you, my dear?
That was me for many years. I was in the performance of people pleasing, trying to be perfect to get everyone to like me.
I gave that up a long time ago, but it still creeps up sometimes. It does for all of us.
Here’s a challenge for you: If you want to do something today that’ll help you face your fear of worrying about what others are thinking of you, do a Facebook LIVE video, and post it.
You’ll never move past where you are today if you’re so busy being concerned about what everyone else is thinking about you.
Others’ opinions of you are NOT your business.
When I got this revelation, I felt so relieved.
Imagine what you could think about if you weren’t so busy thinking about what other people were thinking of you?
This may seem selfish or self-centered. It’s NOT.
Notice that I didn’t say that others’ opinions don’t matter. I said that their opinions of YOU are not YOUR business.
Their opinion(s) of you don’t matter unless:
A. You ask for their opinion.
B. You pay for their opinion.
So often we value others’ opinions of us more than we value our OWN opinion of ourselves.
This will cause you to:
– Feel stuck.
– Hold back.
– Not show up.
– Or show up, but NOT authentically and genuinely.
When you focus on what you don’t want others to think or feel or do, you’re focusing on what you DON’T WANT.
When you focus on what you don’t want, it’s like you’re playing NOT to lose.
Stop doing that.
If you don’t value your opinion of you, then you’ll put it in the hands of others.
When was the last time you took a moment to check in with yourself, and ask, “Self, how are you doing?”
Or are you allowing everyone else to tell you how you’re doing?
The day I stopped doing this, I was set free.
You’re so busy thinking about what others are thinking about you, but they’re not. They’re too busy thinking about what others are thinking about them, or what YOU’RE thinking about them!
It’s an epidemic.
Free yourself from this today. So you can think about things that really matter, and make a difference in your life.
Get on board with yourself, and loving your life + life’s work well.
Stop trying to people please.
Care about people…MORE than their opinions.
Care about YOU. Allow yourself to be you.
Care about people. Allow them to be themselves.
Stop having so many opinions about everyone else, unless they’ve asked, or paid, for your opinion.
People matter. Opinions don’t matter as much as people do.
You matter, and your opinion of YOU matters.
Please grab your SACRED S.O.L. D.A.T.E. JOURNAL (Daily Action To Engage with yourself.)
TODAY’S SACRED S.O.L. STOP:
Write this down. “Other people’s opinions of me, are NONE OF MY BUSINESS.”
Circle it.
Declare and receive this new way of living. In freedom. Today.
xo Dr. Shannon. Inspiring minds that want to grow and hearts that want to know, so you can love you, your life, and your life’s work well. ONE SIP AT A TIME.
A special thanks to the following souls for helping me launch our WOMEN SIPPING ON LIFE podcast…
Intro/Outro done by Uni V. SOL
Outro music by Jay Man: Mind Over Matter (www.ourmusicbox.com)
Podcast cover design and web site done by: Pablo Aguilar (www.webdesigncreator.com)
Podcast cover photo by Kate Montague of KM Captured (www.kmcaptured.com)